My dear
photo/quote: terryq
Many of us have grown up with criticism related to who we are and what we might be capable of becoming.
The criticism often comes from well intentioned parents or family or teachers who are disappointed with our efforts. We do not measure up to their expectations and our less than desirable performances might be seen as evidence of their own failings. They allowed us too many liberties, they did not control us enough and our performances are disappointing to them. Now they have to make up for that so they ridicule our performances hoping for a Jack-in-the-box consequence. Many parents do not want only good children. They want better children. Quite possibly they mean well and by reverting to misguided reverse psychology they hope to make us feel bad enough to try harder and perform better!
The deriding criticism might also come from competitive peers and others who really want to put us down for whatever reason.
Hurt and upset by the criticism, in an understandably foolish kind of angry reaction we sometimes reduce our efforts and stunt our own development. And our performances drop still further proving our critics right in what they said about us.
How wonderful it would be if we did just the opposite. Without defending ourselves or otherwise reacting on the rebound, if we just put to optimum use the resources and talents we have and came out on top of things, consequences would be more desirable and our successes would be evidence of our true worth. Our critics might then have to humbly admit to having been wrong about us.
I remember being laughed at as a child because I could not quite hit the right notes when I sang. I remember having to leave the choir in school because I used to sing off key. I remember twice having to leave the choir when I was a Jesuit scholastic because I used to put the other brothers out of tune….
That was long ago…. the rest is new history I made for myself with music and song.
“Revenge” – sweet or otherwise- is not really the intention or motivation for this exercise. Optimising our own growth is! And in the end each one of us will become more beautiful and fulfilled for having done our best!
Some of us have done that too and it is nice for the world to see where we are now despite the challenges we have grown through. Or maybe precisely because of them!
So stand up and get your “sweet revenge” on the world. Optimise your growth and celebrate your own wonderful becoming. You have my prayers and blessings for this.
Take care. Stay well. Grow wonderful.
Love, Terry