Alan, Andy,Ann, Audrey,
Carol, Christabel, Clarence,Connie, CorinneF,
Florence,Genevieve, Geraldine, Ian, Joan,
Lats, Loo, Louella,
MarisaM, Merle, Mishka, Namita, Nanda,NatashaS,
Nicole,NimishaB, Nimma,
Oleen, Owen,
Praveen, Preethi,
Renny, Rose, Rosita,
Savia, Shaziya, Shona, Stanny, sujataS,
utsha, Valerie, Varsha,VibhaR, Walty,Zaitoon,
Thought I would share something with you. About my own parents.
Briefly – so that you might understand what I have written – my mother suffered from schizophrenia for about 17 years till she passed away. Towards the end of her life she also had a paralysing stroke… and a little later she fell down and fractured her hip. Mind and body all twisted and messed up she died a few years later.
My father faithfully looked after her all through her illness often on the edge of helplessness knowing that nothing would get better for her.
After her death he lived alone ( He refused offers to live with any of his children) and managed much of his life the way he wanted to. He passed away early one morning, alone in his house which he prided himself having and which meant everything to him….
I wrote this a little after he died.
photo/montage : terryq
Beyond horizons quietly gone
They’re gone, both gone across the skies
not much ado, quick gently flown
beyond the distant horizon
beyond the see and comfort touch
of hearth and home and family.
No more the helplessness of age
or illness, freed from cramping bonds
of paralysed and shrinking forms
just memories now left behind
of struggled lives so simply led
of little things spontaneous shared.
No miracles or magic potions
fortune struck or Midas touched
just day to day the blessings seen
and lived just quiet gracefully.
Not much they had, so little asked
and yet like gospel loaves and fish
there was enough for all to have
and something more for days to come.
No ostentatious caring signs
or banners waved to celebrate
successes, birthdays, jubilees;
these taken on in simple stride
and life went on contentedly.
But storms there were wild wretched times
For years when spectres, ugly forms
did scar the peace and comfort zones
when she in other worlds did live
and he stood by in faithful care
attending broken body, mind
till blessing came in peace of death
and she moved on to other skies.
He waited back now patiently
his own life lived the way he wished
dependent on no one but self
with now and then of others aid
unasked for, quietly received
while filling life’s big in-betweens
with little household potterings.
Oft from his lonely balcony
he waved a cheer to passers by
their ups and downs to him denied
except when in necessity
he wandered down uneven roads
for haircut or some marketing.
And when the summons came he left
the way he lived with little fuss
a last salute to all he was
and all he had, now left behind
for other home awaiting him
beyond the walls of need and doubt
beyond horizons far across
to heaven’s mansions unconfined.
From there, celestial balcony
together now in blessed state
they sit and watch our ups and downs
across the rough uneven roads
that we ourselves must walk awhile
come rain or sunshine, song or grief.
They know that good seeds have been sown
and subtled strengths with needs will rise
bear witness to their worth now shown
through lives hard lived and challenge times.
They did the best they knew, they gave
the best they had in heart and kind
perhaps fell short just now and then
but care was what they had in mind.
And when their days to sunset came
with lives well lived and tasks all done
they lightly slipped away in grace
to home beyond new horizons….
terryq: april, 2003