THE DESERT
“Where are you now, when I really need you?” I cried out desperately.
The scorching desert wind rasped the words out of my parched mouth
and tossed them over the merciless sands surrounding me.
Silence. And more silence after that.
The desert has no voice. The desert has no ears. The desert does not care.
All around me mounds of uneven patterned sand dunes hunched malevolently, quite certain that they would win out in the end.
How could I have embarked on this daring venture all on my own?
But I wasn’t alone. At least I didn’t think I would be when I decided to set out.
He would be there too, the holy man. He would be there with his inspiration and his peace and his wisdom. His guiding hand would lead me through the worst of desert storms. His comforting shadow would protect me from the blazing sun.
And I would triumph once again. The better for having dared that much.
Four days had passed. Four dry, torturous, desperate days. And I was still alone. Save for the vast expanse of desert, the relentless sun and the scorching wind.
No inspiration, no wisdom, no peace. Just an ominous silence.
One cannot turn back in the middle of a desert. There are no familiar signs to guide you back to where you came from. The winds and the sands have no loyalty but to themselves. And the footprints you leave behind do not remain there for long.
One just has to move in a dizzy directionless forward bargaining with one’s sanity and despair…..hoping that comfort and relief, though not immediate, are not too far away.
And I had been doing that for four days and nights.
There was still no sign of my holy mentor and friend.
I had felt strong and confident for all that had happened to me earlier.
Had I not conquered forests and mountains and seas? It is true, he had been there with me, but it was I who came out victorious in the end.
Perhaps I had become too arrogant. And the desert seemed like a challenge I just had to accept.
Others had wandered through deserts and had survived. And they did not have the history that I had.
Yes, I had become arrogant. Maybe I believed too much in my own strengths. And the desert must have smiled to itself as I took my first steps forward over the inviting sands. The sands are soft and welcoming in the beginning. And there is always a sense of confidence and conquest over the early challenges. And one moves on purposefully, determinedly, regardless of possible dangers. Victory is all one thinks about in the early stages.
Yes, the desert must have smiled to itself as I strode ahead deeper and deeper into its mysterious bowels.