AUTUMN RESTAURANT
It must be
some discomfort
subtle suppressed
sitting all alone
in an autumn restaurant.
Only fallen leaves
and empty chairs
to spend time with
or talk to.
The silent glasses
empty now
of cheers and voices
songs and warmth
of those who cared
but had to go……
It’s not as if
you yourself
have nowhere
to get up and go to.
Your scene is here.
Your time is now.
“Action……!”
“Cut…………!”
“Print……….!”
And then it goes on.
Editing…..
and the final show.
Fragmented past
filters through
residual foliage.
Play patterns
break into dream ballets
of softened sunlight.
You take it all in
and still believe
in yesterdays and tomorrows
in friends and caring.
No one who has been
a close while with you
can ever go away.
No one who has
shared a seat
or a cup of tea;
who has walked a mile
or braved a storm with you;
No one
who has sat still at twilight
or learnt with you
to smell the flowers
can ever go away.
The silent stirrings of your soul
come and go, gently reminding….
And you breathe in
a greater definition of presence
than your senses allow.
You are not alone
although no one is there with you.
I often wonder much myself
about the things that matter
in togetherness……….
Being there?
Writing letters?
Sending caringly wrapped gifts?
Recognizing your voice over the phone
even before you speak?
Or travelling an extra unnecessary way
just to be with you?
Do these things matter?
May be they do…..
Or maybe we’ll find out
just by doing them till they pass.
And in all of this
to be really free.
Deeply free inside
so that you can come and go
and I can come and go
and we will always be there.
And there will be others too,
those who were there
in the now autumn restaurant.
Those who were there
in the spring and summer.
Those who laughed and sang,
those who ran in the rain,
those who just sat down
to “middle-age” passages of time,
those who brought with them
and shared for a while
the mellowness of friendship
and fellowship and caring.
Once upon a time
the autumn restaurant
was alive
and that precious season
no one can take away from you.
( Sammy- 11.2.’91)
Besides
the autumn restaurant
life
could also be
like standing
with your back
to the writing
on the wall.
You do not know
for sure
but you wait expectantly.
Maybe someday
someone will come
and help you read
the lines
and what is there
inbetween.
Things
will change then…
Shadows will fade
into the distance
Your life
will be the pen
that writes again.
The wall
will be the world
more beautiful now
for what
you have written on it……
( Sammy. 19.2. ’91)